Friday was fun, mostly because I was BAD-ASS and decided to wear my horrible, horrible Winger T-Shirt to go see Queens Players.
For those of you who have not heard Winger, they are awful:
Is this song about statuatory rape?
For those of you who have not heard of Queens Players, it is awesome. It’s basically a skit comedy show in a bar with a bunch of drinking and kareoke and poutine. Yes. It is the best of all worlds, smashed together into a drunken perfect-storm.
Pam and I independantly decided to be super grungy and both wear horrble heavy metal shirts with plaid. It was SO EMBARRASSING.
Pam and I have this word that we invented called “Mlashing”. You know when you see a group of chicks walking down the street, and they are basically wearing the EXACT same thing? Like, uggs, skinny jeans, and a fucking Ed Hardy T-Shirt (for example)? They fucking match-clash. They are SO similar, that it is actually jarring to my brain, so they are actually clashing. It’s called mlashing. COINED THAT SHIT.
Anyways, Pam and I were hardcore mlashing. So much so that we felt really awkward standing next to each other in the sea of Queen’s University uggs and skinny jeans and Ed Hardy T-Shirts.
Later on that night, I went to Tami & Rob’s place, where I was:
- Wishing Robbie a happy birthday; and
- Congratulating them on their engagement! YEY!
I also met Walter, Matt’s new puppy, who is the cutest guy on Earth. Molly and him had some wrestles, and SOMEBODY peed on the bed while everyone was downstairs. I like to think it was Walter. Hopefully. I really hope.
Even though I got home at like 3:00 am, AND ate an entire Quarter Pounder Combo with 6 Chicken McNuggs on the side at 3:01 am, I got up early on Saturday.
Because I am suddenly an old woman and needed to get my tulip bulbs in the ground before the first frost came. Yes. That is my current level of super-coolness.
Yes, it’s true. The bulbs at Loblaws SuperCentre were on sale for half-price, so I bought about 75 of them.
FYI, it is really hard to plant 75 bulbs in an area that is about 2 feet square. I’m pretty sure I killed a bunch of them by accidentally re-digging them up to plant new ones…
Incidentally, did you know that tulip bulbs smell like little delicious onions? Because my tulip bulbs smelled like little delicious onions. And I really wanted to cut one up and sautee it and eat it and see if it tasted like a little delicious onion. But I didn’t because that would be weird.
Speaking of weird, later on that day, I came dangerously close to buying a suede vest with SUPER FRINGE all over it, and little beads all strung to it.
It was one of those pieces that I had seen on some really hot, skinny chick in the summer who was wearing it with cut off jean shorts that were so short that her ass cheek was grossly jiggling out when she walked. But because she was skinny and pretty, guys were all foaming at the mouth around her, so OBVIOUSLY I had to try and emulate her.
At first I was like: “Do I look all hot like that hot chick in the summer with the jiggle-ass?”
And then I was like “No. No you do not. You look like a hipster Pochahontas with a fat ass.”