Natalie’s Take on Nuptials
Ok, I need to take a break from Chicago Natalie – I’ll post the conclusion this weekend, but I’m feeling a little “insane-Chicago-Natalied-out”.
I’m going to a wedding tomorrow. Unlike the picture you see above, where I am the only girl above 13 who is “eligible” to attend the bouquet toss, there are many things about weddings that I really like.
These are the things that I like about weddings:
Usually, when you get to the reception, there are little appetizers and canapes. I fucking LOVE little appetizer things. Then, you get to the table, and there is usually a big, overflowing basket of rolls… with butta, and they bring more if you ask them to. Then courses, courses, courses. A perfect excuse to gorge myself on food stuffs. And most of the people I know have some additional midnight food item… usually it’s poutine. Natalie loves food in her belly.
When you’re an adult, you don’t have tons of opportunities to be fancy. Going to a wedding permits my “fancy” alternative personality to be released like a mushroom cloud of sparkles and chiffon petticoat layers.
3. Permission to Dance Like Elaine from Seinfeld.
For those of you who have seen me dance after a couple of drinks, you are a select and privileged few. Weddings are prime “Natalie Seizure-Dancing” sighting grounds. I’m sure that Saturday will be no exception.
4. Yes. The Open Bar.
As per my numerous previous allusions to my alcoholism, I like to drink the beers. I also enjoy consuming beers without “paying” for them. And since weddings are usually a “per hour” cost for alcohol (not per item consumed), I don’t feel bad about consuming SEVERAL over the course of the night.
Brrrap, brrrap! Bring on dem nuptials!